“You don’t give a shit about anyone but yourself…”

28 Aug

Photo via FFFOUND!

I loved this photo immediately when I came across it. The colors are vibrantly saturated and the irony of the letters is hilarious surrounded by happy balloons and sprinkles. But what I loved most was the imagined story I see behind the photograph.

The birthday boy here is 6 so like, duh he doesn’t give a shit about anyone but himself. But you know, sometimes Mom just wants say to the little precocious nightmare, “Bobby, STFU. I exist here too, goddamnit!” She was probably baking this cake for the person she loves most in the world, little Bobby, but was distracted, whilst stirring the batter, by all the terrible things he had done during the last week.

Bobby pushed his sister Sally down the stairs leaving her a paraplegic, he colored all over the walls of his room with Mom’s expensive adult crayons and started a coup on the playground where he held 5 weaker children hostage while threatening their lives if he didn’t get a free week of hot lunch.

As she stirred and stirred, she became angrier replaying her impromptu parent-teacher conference where Bobby was expelled from 1st grade, all the hospital visits to Sally’s bedside and the resulting medical bills piling up. She remembered how much work it was to explain to the cleaning lady how to properly remove crayons from Bobby’s bedroom wall and how pissed she was on Thursday when she wanted to color but had no supplies.

Mom remembered all these things and she found herself making an extra trip to the grocery store to find just the right letters to sum up her sentiments.

And this cake is what came out. And boy, does it look delicious.

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